How to Make Your Blog Disappear Completely (And Never Be Viewed Again)By helen Under Blogging, Search Engine Optimization
This make money online article is guest posted by Carol Wilson
As a kid, you probably wished you could turn invisible. Who didn’t? As an adult blogger, you probably feel invisible on a regular basis, and direct all your energy toward more views. It’s easy to be overlooked—there are millions of blogs to read, and billions of people poring over them, only giving half a second’s glance before moving on to the next one.
Hopefully you read the title of this post and thought, “But I don’t want my blog to disappear completely and never be viewed again!” That was the correct response. If you want your blog to get more attention and be consistently great, such that readers keep coming back (and bring more readers with them), then the following list should point you in the right direction.
For the sake of clarity, I’m just going to go ahead and remind you that this is an ironic list. If you don’t want to disappear from the blogosphere and go forever unnoticed, DO THE OPPOSITE OF EVERYTHING THAT FOLLOWS:
1. Indulge in your narcissism.
Everyone hates narcissists, especially on a website that’s supposed to be about helping others. Keeping an online record of how you solve your personal problems might be personally therapeutic, but it is socially irrelevant, and professionally alienating and boring.
Even if you manage to expand your meditations on your problems to include universal problems others can relate to, you still aren’t fulfilling the basic purpose of a professional blog—offering advice, tips, and solutions to your readers that are important to them.
Writing “I just improved my SEO ranking by 20%” is a sure-fire way to get people to never look at your blog again. If you’re trying to eject your dedicated readers and keep new ones away, definitely never say things like, “Do you wish you could improve your SEO rankings?” Never address or focus on the readers if you want them to abandon you; this will attract them, and probably even keep them reading.
2. Be as pretentious as possible.
Nothing screams elitism and alienation like pretentious language and ideas. Talk about your niche as if everyone knows everything about it, and never condescend to give them necessary background information.
Exclude anyone who isn’t also an expert, and solely discuss obscure, erudite, and impractical topics in a way that is inconclusive and meandering. Doing all of these things will almost infallibly make all your readers jump ship, and effectively deter new ones from ever repeating one visit.
Conversely, respecting your readership enough to introduce topics that are relevant to their everyday experience, explain them thoroughly in a friendly, familiar tone will probably keep readers reading, and might even inspire them to encourage others to visit your site. If you want to preserve the deserted aspect of your blog, better not do this.
3. Hack away any visually attractive design elements from your page.
In fact, try to make your page as visually confusing as you can. Intentionally place ads in inconvenient places; use garish color schemes; arrange your content in disorienting ways—anything you can do to keep the experience challenging and frustrating for readers will help keep them far from your blog.
Never take the time to make your blog look respectable, clean, attractive, or beautiful; this will only frame your blog with pleasing images, and give your readers an all-around extraordinary blog experience, which will certainly convince them to make repeat visits and spread the word.
If you follow these steps, you’ll have zero followers in no time, and you can watch as your blog’s livelihood shrivels to nothing. However, if you don’t want to just stand by and let your blog become invisible, don’t follow these steps—do the opposite of what you see here, and you’ll be on your way to a popular, successful blog.
This is a guest post from Carol Wilson who writes for business insurance. She contributes articles about a variety of marketing, business, stock market, small business topics. She can be contacted at: wilson.carol24 @ gmail.com.